Granola Bars

When granola bars became more popular and started invading all my friend's lunch boxes, I was probably the only one out there who disliked them. I just didn't understand what was so great about them. They could never satisfy me. If I craved for something sweet, I'd rather eat a candy bar than a granola bar. If I wanted a healthy snack, I'd rather go for an apple or any other fruit. Granola bars are part of this annoying "in between category" that I cannot stand. Not sweet, nor salty, not completely junk nor healthy, not crunchy, nor soft, nor melty or crispy. Just IN BETWEEN. I cannot imagine a day where I would wake up and crave for something that is nothing. Granola bars are too ambivalent for me. I know what I want and most of my cravings are very clearly defined.

Unfortunately, one of my old friends is a granola bar to me. It took me several years to realize she was a granola bar. We labeled ourselves as super friends when we were very young, but never shared anything in common really. She has known me for the longest time, but it does not mean she ever dug me. As another close friend said to me when I was really upset one evening, "Davine, you have many friends who fulfill different roles in your life, but you know your granola friend was never the one to understand and support your aspirations".

This granola bar friend has never been there for me...well, not emotionally there. She would make sure to be there for really important times like when I got married or pregnant since this is what she believes what good friends are for. That is what makes her a decent friend to keep around I guess...She would be there physically, but never in thoughts. She is an awful listener and constantly judged me but I know I can rely on her to be there at my funeral since she shows up at all the most important life events...

She knows nothing about me now and has put me in a box as if she had me all figured out. It seems like I am solely part of her archives, but will never show up in her present or future plans. When we talk, all we do is reminisce about the past, but we clearly do not share anything interesting from our current lives. Like a granola bar, she isn't toxic, or bad for me. But she's not good either and our relationship isn't the healthiest. It is hard to know where to stand with a granola bar friend since she never did anything bad enough to make me want to get her out of my life...but now, I am wondering where I could even fit her into my life.

When I got seriously ill over the summer, instead of listening and empathizing with me, she was too busy correcting my French translation of the disease diagnosis rather than supporting me while I was opening myself to her and crying all the tears out of my body. She never takes anything I say or do seriously. Even the disease itself, where I had to get seven surgeries, she still thought all I had was a little infection. If she doesn't take what I went through seriously, it is clear to me now that she will never change.

Every time I share with her a new passion, or a new project I am tackling, she would interrupt me to say she isn't interested in listening to anything nor reading anything I wrote until it was truly serious and published, for example. I am tempted to tell her, whenever she comes to vent to me about her relationship, that I am not interested in listening to her personal problems until she gets married and not waste my time since it doesn't seem serious...her guy could just walk out of her life anytime, so why bother me with her non serious matters? Why are we even friends if we do not want to be there to support and encourage each other?

In her eyes, I was always too dramatic, too paranoid, too defensive, too emotional. Well, I now look back and understand that I was never too anything. I was just me. She simply appreciated nothing about me nor cared to understand and discover my character. I am now keeping my distances from her. I am tired of her craving for my friendship whenever she gets pregnant. It seems like it is the only time she remembers I exist and suddenly seeks for my comfort. I am sorry but now that I know she is just like any other granola bar, I will stay away from her. That is one thing that at least she knows, is how much I despise granola bars...Do not worry that she will find this post and recognize herself. That would be too great actually. But she's such a wonderful friend [insert sarcasm here] that she has NEVER read any single one of my blog posts.

She is not a bad person, but she is not someone I want to spend more of my loving energy on. Life is too short to waste it one someone who never hit any spot...I don't feel like she deserves my committed friendship because when I love someone, I love with passion. I could never enjoy granola bars with passion. I just can't...

She says tomatoes, you say BEURK!

I have some friends who are so opinionated about their music and entertainment. They take so much pride in what they like and sometimes, to a point where they would purposely stop hanging out with someone just because that person doesn't share their same interest. I know a guy who strictly hangs out with musicians since he started playing the guitar. And he stopped calling his old best friend even though they used to have fun together, even without any music involved.

I think it's normal to favor people who have things in common with you and similar taste but only to a certain limit. When you become a snob about most things you like, that's where I have a problem. For instance, I don't understand why another friend I have needs to be such a donut hole about music. He's such a hipster about his music and discriminates and mocks anyone who enjoys mainstream sounds. And he wonders why he remains single. He eliminated more than half of single lady population just by the type of music they like to listen to.

I can already imagine this scenario: He starts seeing this girl, his dream girl, pretty as a rose, and she invites him to her apartment. She planned the entire evening, with candles and sexy lingerie. He's in awe when he sees her and cannot believe she wrapped herself like a chocolate box just for him. And then, she puts on some music with the intention of giving him a nice little sexy dance. Then he realizes it's Marvin Gaye he's hearing and he runs out of her apartment, completely turned off by her. Seriously, this friend I have is so serious about his music that he would completely miss out on a real romance opportunity for such a ludicrous reason. The sad part is that I am not even exaggerating.

I'm not sure where I'm going with this post. I just wished those people knew, when looking for love, how tiny and irrelevant it is in their relationship long term, as music changes all the time, but not their core values. They should look for people who love music since it is THAT important in their lives, but not reject someone just because they enjoy some old Madonna or Aerosmith...

Tossing a baby like a pizza



I just had to share this outrageous video with you all...So apparently child abuse is acceptable as long as we call it baby yoga... Yea right...I cannot believe they toss those babies around like a pizza and all those moms line up and believe it's the best thing they can give to their babies. UNACCEPTABLE.