Soul Pancake: What does Love look like to YOU?

 ( Go get your tissue box). LOVED this video. <3

I Fondly Remember the Disgusting Smell of Sugar Crisps cereal...

Did you enjoy the Super Bowl this year? I have never been a huge  TV sports fan but I thoroughly enjoyed watching it this time around. I am normally one of those who watch the big game to discover the new commercials. The only ad that truly caught my attention this year, was the Budweiser commercial featuring the heartwarming story of the horse who recognized his first owner. It shook my childhood memories and reminded me of a long lost furry friend I once had...

The next morning, I went on a wild goose chase all over the house to find two old Polaroids. I am not sure if I kept them in an album that I left at my parent's house up in Canada, or if they moved with me and are still buried somewhere in the unopened moving boxes since this past summer...I still haven't found them, but I will keep looking.

These two photos were the only ones I had of happy kiddie me holding my puppy named Chico. Back when I was four or five, we lived in a triplex apartment complex with my parents, brother, grandmother, two uncles and an aunt in Longueuil city. While we didn't seem to be crammed enough, one of my uncles brought home two German Sheppard pups. They named them Chico and Mino.

I barely had any toys growing up. These puppies were the best thing I ever got to play with. Chico was my favorite pup. He had a little mole on his left cheek and had the softest look on his eyes, as if he worried whether I was ok. He had this compassionate head tilt and and a soft, constantly concerned frown where his brows would be, if he had any. I found so much comfort in him and we bonded so greatly.

Barely a few weeks later, on a school morning, I woke up and realized in horror that both puppies were gone. My parents decided we were overly crowded in the apartment and that they required too much attention.  I wished they warned me ahead so I could hug Chico goodbye. I was so sad but I wasn't allowed to display my anger and sadness to anyone. Because I was only a child, I was ordered to just accept their decision and move on. And so I did.

I did a pretty good job at letting him go. But whenever someone poured themselves a bowl of disgusting Sugar Crisp cereal, I was reminded of Chico. I started hating that cereal a little less since Chico was gone as they reminded me of him. With his bionic dog ears, he would run up to the kitchen before they even had time to finish pouring their milk. I hated the smell of those cereal, which reminded me of roasted coffee beans, back then. Now, I'm sure I would get a little teary if I smelled them again.

Many years later, while I was working at my parent's store, the one in the Villeray neighborhood, a huge German Sheppard dog ran into the store, followed by a middle-age man. The dog ran without hesitating around the counter and jumped on me and licked me. This wasn't uncommon though, and most dogs would do that whenever they came into the store. Perhaps my father would give them treats. But this dog was different. He was persistent and kept on kissing my hands and thighs with his snout, and stared right at me. And then, I saw a mole on his right cheek. " Could it be you, my Chico?". I quickly chased that thought and was too shy to ask his owner anything. When they left, the dog dragged his paws and didn't seem to want to leave and his owner whistled and said " Come on Chico! Let's go buddy!". It was such a happy and sad moment at the same time. I am almost 100% certain it was him....

Finding your own carb :)

A while back, a dear friend asked me how I knew he was the one....

People are so afraid of carbs nowadays. They ruin your sweet, skinny, lean look. People are so afraid of relationships too. They ache your heart. I wish people wouldn't fear carbs so much. I think if you've had issues with carbs, you just need to learn to juggle with portions and allow room for other food categories on your plate. Easier said than done, I know. I don't think running away from carbs completely is healthy as it makes you backlash and splurge into an unhealthy decadent dessert to overcompensate for the lack of solid and healthy carbs.

I surely love my jasmine rice. Yes, I am feeding the Asian stereotype. Well, in my case, it is true that I can barely skip a day or two without rice. I quickly realized that Komar was my jasmine rice, vital for my overal sanity.

I knew it was him when I realized I couldn't spend a day without him from the moment we met.  I couldn't tell whether it was love or passion or just attraction at first. All I knew was that I could not imagine a day breathing without knowing he was o. k and happy somewhere ( back then, he was in D.C while I was still up in Montreal). We cared about each other, as simple as that. He always made sure I felt and knew how much he cared about me. We didn't need to play mind games or try to decode each other. Our feelings were pure and backed with clear actions. No promises were spoken in vain. We were together, as committed to one another.

I wanted to be the best friend and support I could be for him and I could feel he felt the same way too. When we JUST met each other, we connected in a very special way and I wasn't afraid of being vulnerable with him. I wanted him to be happy and he as well for me. I gave him my heart and he kept it pumping since.

I knew he was my rice. He makes my heart and soul feel satiated and content, yet I always want and need more. I discovered very quickly that he was my jasmine rice. He brings me comfort in a way no one else can. He is addictive yet, never sickening and I enjoy every instant with him. He is so flexible that I can garnish his life with any craziness I want and it would pair well with him. Even when we argue, I still feel so much love in his frustration, because he's fighting hard to make his point come across simply because he cares THAT much. Otherwise, you wouldn't hear a peep coming out of him. ( yes, quiet guy). :P

He keeps my heart and soul healthy, full and happy. I met several wrong carbs, and used to chase after "ice cream parfait" men. There are plenty of banana splits, brownies and hot fudge sundaes out there, all very attractive and yummy. But I could never digest that every single day. And after the first sugar rush, you crash very fast into reality and routine.

Once you find someone who could be your potato, bread, pasta or rice and you know they feel as nourished the same way with you, then I think that is how you know....