Love Cake

Moêt Chandon Nectar Impérial and Brotherhood

Today is the 1.1.11 and at 11hr11 pm, we decided to make a wish...actually, I made eleven wishes, in the spirit of the "ones"and all the ones I love. We celebrated New Year's Eve with my husband's best friend and other friends stopped by during the evening. We popped a Moêt Chandon Nectar Impérial Champagne and watched 2010 leave through the fireworks while my little taste buds were savoring every single drop of this new Champagne discovery. What a sweet nectar and what a great midnight kiss.

After a couple of stressful weeks we had, the year ended very gracefully. That same night, I found out my dear grandmother was released from the hospital. She was able to spend New Year's Eve at home with my family. I couldn't have asked for more.

The year ending means resolutions. One of my biggest resolution is to finally start working on a device that would send a radar or signal notifying me that a person is not worth my time. I don't think that gadget exists yet and I am betting I could make a fortune with it. How often did you invest into a relationship after finding out, sometime ten years later, that you didn't mean as much to the other person? My machine would be able to detect heart rate as they declare or profess their love to me and would make a correlation with their level of needs and true intentions. That way, everyone will know right off hand when the friendship meter is too low...

I have this absolute fascination and admiration for brotherhood. The loyalty and camaraderie between men is the type of friendship I truly yearn for. I thought for a while that I must be simply too romantic, and that it leaked outside of my intimate relationship with my husband and that I was so romantic I even needed this level of intensity and dedication from my friends for instance. But then, I thought about brotherhood. I grew up witnessing brotherhood, watching my older brother and his friends. Friendship amongst men seems so much simpler to me and is the closest to my ideal of friendship. They don't have the need to talk or disclose everything all the time, judge each other on a personal level. They simply enjoy each others company, find a concrete activity they commonly share and when the important times comes where a true friend is needed ( like helping to move, or being the Best man at a wedding), they simply show up and play their respective role of the good friend. I look at my husband and his best friend for example. They have a very low maintenance relationship but they are always there for each other and I see they can always rely on each other when help is needed. They don't talk much but they are all about actions. No drama. No games. Pure camaraderie and mutual respect. So simple and refreshing. When they meet, it's to share a concrete activity that they enjoy and they are loyal to each other and return favors to each other.

Sorting a relationship with a lover is also much simpler to me than figuring out where I am at with my female friends ( I didn't say less painful though but at least, you can gauge and end the relationship when it doesn't turn out the way you want it sooner) . When dating someone, it is more natural to try to find out where the relationship is going, what are the common goals and all. If some of my friends were men, they would have been long gone if it was in a dating setting. But in a friendship, it becomes trickier. And then, there are labels or non-existing labels. When relationship labels are made, they create expectations. Sometimes labels worsen the end goal, especially when declared too soon. Right now, I also wish I made a machine that also prints out labels for each of my friends, so I know how to act accordingly, and what to expect from each of them. At the same time, some already had labels but they were declared too soon due to lack of maturity and dragged for so long I can't remove the sticker anymore...My intensity and passion for relationships is often left malnourished but I will not stop embracing this passion. What I will do, however, is to better chose who to devote this passion to. To me, we are born and one day, we die. In between, it is about whose lives we have an impact on, who is helping us grow during this journey of life and how we will be remembered. I will simply have to stop devoting this love to people who don't share the same level of friendship dedication as me and that is truly my 2011 Resolution.

"The hardest thing to learn in life is which bridge to cross and which to burn." -David Russell

Making a toast to all my true good people out there who have been there for me, to all the new relationships that I celebrate and embrace, and to everyone else who are passionate about the Art of loving and relationships.

Happy New Year and Best Wishes for 2011.