Dog Cookies TreatsI can't help but cringe when I hear proud women gloat about how they've "trained" their men well. As if they were dogs or something. Perhaps they did end up with a dog. Or perhaps their man became dogs after being treated like one for too long. I like to believe people respond the way we treat them.
I take more pride in the fact that my dear husband does what he does because he enjoys doing it and that he does it out of his free will. He naturally thinks of calling to let us know where and what he's doing and to check up on us. He enjoys being a hands-on dad with our son. He thrives in becoming the best husband and father he can be for us and he does that because he values those notions. It is not the result of some manipulative technique, threat or power play and mind games.
I value rewarding positive behavior, but in my dictionary, it's called gratefulness. Not dog training. Perhaps I'm just stuck on different wording? You can imagine the look on my face when people see my husband help out with chores and kid care and tell me how well I trained him (shaking my head).
When there is some sort of disconnect in a relationship, it has nothing to do with whether one or the other has trained the person well or not, in order to remain satisfied and have all the expectations met. Both people need to want to do things for the other one, and wanting to be with that person should be motivating enough to make an effort to cater to that person. If let's say, the physical attraction isn't really there anymore, or if you would rather go to bed than spend some quality time with your love, it does not make him or her a bad person. When there is clearly a disconnect, both need to want to acknowledge there is a problem in order to find steps to fix it. A great shoe is a great shoe but can only go so far. It takes a full pair to move forward....
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